AITA for Telling My Boyfriend I Don’t Want to Pay for His Hobbies?
Money and hobbies can be a tricky mix in relationships. One woman draws the line when her boyfriend expects her to contribute to his costly interests. Is she being fair, or should partners support each other in all ways?
The Original Post: His Expensive Interests
He Expects Me to Help Fund His Hobbies
My boyfriend has several expensive hobbies—gaming, collecting sneakers, and going on fishing trips with his friends. I don’t mind that he has these interests, but recently, he’s been asking me to help pay for them.
At first, it was small things—covering dinner when he was “saving up” for a new gaming console or lending him money for a fishing trip. But now, he’s openly expecting me to contribute because “we’re a team.”
I told him I’m happy to split expenses for things we both enjoy, like date nights or vacations, but I don’t think I should be paying for his personal hobbies. He got upset and said I wasn’t being supportive. Now, I’m wondering if I’m being too harsh. Am I the asshole?
The Community Reacts: Financial Boundary or Selfish Move?
Many people agreed that refusing to pay for my boyfriend’s hobbies was completely reasonable.
“You’re his partner, not his financial sponsor.”
“If he can’t afford his hobbies, he needs to budget better, not rely on you.”
“Supporting a partner doesn’t mean funding their unnecessary expenses.”
However, some thought I should reconsider.
“If you expect financial help from him in other areas, maybe it should go both ways.”
“In a serious relationship, sometimes you do things just to make your partner happy.”
“If this is a long-term relationship, wouldn’t your money be shared at some point anyway?”
The Verdict: Setting Financial Boundaries or Being Unfair?
While some believed I should be more flexible, most agreed that refusing to pay for my boyfriend’s hobbies was a fair boundary to set.
At the end of the day, a relationship should be about mutual respect—not financial dependence. Would you ever help fund your partner’s hobbies, or would you set the same boundary? Let us know in the comments!
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