AITAH for Not Letting My Parents Move in With Me After They Retired?
Family is important, but does that mean I have to let my retired parents move in with me? They assumed I’d be okay with it, but I feel overwhelmed by the idea. AITAH for refusing?
Background Information
My parents have always been loving and supportive, but they never planned well for retirement. They assumed they could rely on their children when the time came. I have my own house and live alone, enjoying my independence.
Recently, my parents retired and, without much warning, said, “We’re thinking of selling our place and moving in with you.”
The Main Conflict
I was shocked. “Wait, what? Move in with me?”
Mom nodded. “We don’t want to deal with maintaining our house anymore. It just makes sense.”
I hesitated. “I love you both, but I don’t think this is a good idea. I’m not ready to have roommates, even if it’s family.”
Dad sighed. “So, what? You’d rather see us struggle somewhere else?”
They made it sound like I was abandoning them, but I never agreed to this arrangement. I suggested they look into retirement communities or downsizing, but they weren’t interested.
The Aftermath
Since that conversation, things have been tense. They keep dropping hints about how lonely they’ll be or how hard it is to find a new place. My siblings think I should just let them stay, but they aren’t offering their own homes as an option.
Now I feel guilty, but I also don’t think I should have to rearrange my life for a decision they made without consulting me.
Community Reaction
“You’re not responsible for their lack of planning. They should have figured this out years ago.”
“It’s unfair for them to expect you to take on the role of caregiver without asking first.”
“If your siblings think it’s so easy, they can offer their own homes.”
“They have other options. They just don’t want to consider them.”
“Setting boundaries doesn’t mean you don’t love them.”
Final Thoughts
I love my parents, but I don’t think their retirement plan should automatically become my responsibility.
AITAH for refusing to let them move in with me?
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