AITAH for Not Letting My Brother’s Kids Use My Home Office as a Playroom?

When family stays over, especially with kids, things can get chaotic fast. But what happens when their chaos interferes with your career and personal space? A recent post on r/AITAH spotlighted a situation many remote workers can relate to: OP (original poster) refused to let their brother’s children use their meticulously set-up home office as a temporary playroom during a family visit — and the backlash was immediate.

In this post, we’ll break down the dilemma, explore the clash between boundaries and family expectations, and discuss how to assert your needs without becoming the “bad guy.”

The Scenario: Work vs. Family Chaos

OP explained that they work full-time from home and have converted a spare room into a professional home office — complete with expensive equipment, sensitive documents, and a quiet environment essential to their job.

When OP’s brother and his family came to visit for a week, they brought along two energetic toddlers. Within the first few hours, toys were everywhere, and noise levels were off the charts. OP set clear boundaries: the home office was off-limits.

The brother and his spouse didn’t take it well. They argued that since OP doesn’t have kids, the room wasn’t being “fully utilized” after work hours. They felt the kids should have a dedicated space to play, and since the home office was available in the evenings, it was “selfish” of OP not to share.

Cue the family drama.

Why Boundaries Are Not Selfish — They’re Necessary

Let’s get one thing clear: having family visit doesn’t mean you stop being entitled to privacy, quiet, and the use of your own space.

Here’s why OP’s stance is more than justified:

• The office is a workspace, not a playroom. Delicate electronics, client documents, and a professional setting aren’t suitable for roughhousing toddlers.

• Respecting property matters. Just because someone is family doesn’t mean they’re entitled to take over your home.

• Boundaries protect relationships. Ironically, enforcing respectful boundaries early can prevent long-term resentment or blowouts.

What Could Have Been Done Differently?

While OP was within their rights, there’s always room to manage these situations with empathy. A few potential strategies include:

• Offer alternatives: Suggest other rooms or rearrange the living room temporarily with toys and cushions.

• Compromise on hours: If safe, designate limited play time in the office under supervision — but only if OP is comfortable.

• Communicate expectations before the visit: A heads-up like, “Just FYI, the home office is off-limits” can prevent drama later.

Why Family Often Crosses the Line (and How to Push Back Politely)

In many families, especially close-knit ones, the line between sharing and overstepping is blurry. People might assume access to your home and things just because of the relationship.

When that happens, here are some polite yet firm ways to push back:

• “I know it seems like just a room, but it’s my workspace — and I need to keep it secure.”

• “I’m happy to help find another space for the kids to play, but I’m not comfortable with them using the office.”

• “Let’s work together to find a compromise that works for everyone.”

What Reddit Had to Say

The r/AITAH community largely sided with OP. Most commenters emphasized the importance of preserving workspaces, especially in the age of remote jobs. Some shared horror stories of toddlers deleting files, breaking monitors, or damaging gear.

Others pointed out that the parents had unrealistic expectations — staying in someone’s home is a privilege, not a license to rearrange it.

Final Thoughts: You’re Not Obligated to Sacrifice Your Space

Wanting to protect your home office doesn’t make you heartless — it makes you responsible. It’s your space, your equipment, and ultimately, your choice.

Setting clear and respectful boundaries with guests, even family, isn’t just okay — it’s healthy. You can be a great host without surrendering your entire house.