AITAH for Asking My Roommate to Pay More Rent Because She Has a Bigger Room?

Living with roommates can be a great way to save money and build friendships—but it can also lead to tension when things feel unfair. One Reddit user took to the r/AITAH subreddit with a simple question that sparked a fiery debate: Am I the a**hole for asking my roommate to pay more rent because her room is twice the size of mine?

Let’s dive into this dilemma and see who’s really in the wrong.

The Situation: A Room Size Dispute Turns into a Financial Debate

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The original poster (OP), a 26-year-old woman, shares a two-bedroom apartment in a city where rent isn’t cheap. When she and her roommate, Sophie, moved in, they agreed to split the rent 50/50 to make things simple. At the time, OP was in a rush to move out of her previous place, and Sophie offered to handle the apartment search.

When they moved in, OP was surprised to find that Sophie had chosen the master bedroom—complete with an en suite bathroom, a walk-in closet, and nearly double the square footage.

At first, OP let it slide. But now, after living there for six months, resentment is building. OP pays the same amount of rent but has a much smaller space, no private bathroom, and barely enough room for a desk.

So, she finally brought it up: should they reconsider how the rent is split?

Sophie’s response? Absolutely not.

Sophie’s Perspective: A Deal Is a Deal

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Sophie argues that they agreed on the rent split when they signed the lease, and OP had the chance to say something back then. She feels that OP is going back on an agreement just because she’s “jealous” of the bigger room.

From Sophie’s view, she did the legwork to find the apartment, secured the lease, and made a decision that worked best for her. If OP had wanted the larger room, she should’ve said something at the start.

Changing the financial terms now, Sophie says, is unfair and manipulative.

OP’s Perspective: Equality Isn’t Always 50/50

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OP isn’t asking Sophie to pay all the rent—just more than 50%. She points out that in most roommate situations, it’s common to split rent based on room size, especially when one room includes extra features like a private bathroom or more square footage.

She feels that paying the same amount for less space is simply not fair—and Sophie is being unreasonable by refusing to even consider a new arrangement.

“I’m not trying to start a fight,” she wrote, “but I also don’t want to keep pretending like this is a fair setup.”

What Reddit Thinks: Is OP the Villain?

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Reddit users were quick to weigh in—and the community was surprisingly split.

Support for OP

Many users agreed that rent should reflect room size and amenities, especially when there’s a major difference.

“It’s totally normal to split rent by room value,” one commenter wrote. “I wouldn’t pay the same if I had a shoebox and my roommate had a suite.”

Others noted that just because an agreement was made initially doesn’t mean it can’t be revisited—especially if the original decision was made in haste.

“Agreements should be fair. If the reality is very unbalanced, it’s okay to talk about it.”

Support for Sophie

On the other hand, plenty of users pointed out that OP waited too long to speak up and is now trying to rewrite the terms after benefiting from a simple rent split.

“You had the chance to speak up six months ago. It’s not cool to agree and then try to renegotiate when it doesn’t benefit you.”

Some also noted that moving forward, OP could consider a different arrangement or even a new apartment if the issue can’t be resolved.

The Bigger Issue: Communication and Fairness

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At the heart of this AITAH story is a fundamental question: What does fairness really look like in shared living?

Roommate dynamics depend heavily on clear communication and mutual respect. While formal agreements are important, so is ongoing dialogue. Circumstances change, and it’s reasonable for roommates to revisit arrangements as needed—especially if one party feels taken advantage of.

However, timing matters. Raising the issue six months in can feel like backtracking—especially if there was never an initial complaint. That’s where OP may have misstepped.

Lessons Learned for Roommates Everywhere

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If you’re moving in with a roommate, here are a few key takeaways from this scenario:

  • Talk About Room Size and Rent Early: Before signing anything, discuss how space and costs will be divided.

  • Put Agreements in Writing: Even among friends, having expectations on paper helps avoid future misunderstandings.

  • Revisit When Necessary—but Respectfully: If something feels unfair, bring it up—but be prepared for compromise, not confrontation.

  • Don’t Let Resentment Build: Bottling up frustration only makes the situation harder to resolve later.

Final Verdict: A Soft “No,” But With a Caveat

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So, is OP the villain here?

Most would say no—but with a note of caution. While it’s fair to want a more equitable rent split, OP’s delay in bringing it up makes it harder to argue. She’s not wrong for feeling the situation is unfair, but she missed her chance to negotiate it from the start.

Still, Sophie’s flat-out refusal to even discuss the issue isn’t great either.

This is one of those cases where nobody is necessarily the villain—but better communication could’ve prevented all of it.

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