AITAH for Blocking My Parents on Social Media After They Ignored My Boundaries?
Setting boundaries with family is hard. Especially when those boundaries involve social media—a space that feels personal yet public. I never thought I’d be the person to block my own parents, but after months of ignored requests and passive-aggressive comments, I finally hit my limit. Now, I’m left wondering: Was I wrong?
The Backstory Unfolds
Growing up, my parents were always involved in my life—sometimes too involved. They’d show up unannounced, demand constant updates, and even monitor my friendships. When I moved out at 22, I thought I’d finally have space to breathe. But social media became their new way to keep tabs on me.
At first, it was harmless: liking my posts, commenting “Miss you!” But soon, it escalated. They’d criticize my outfits in DMs, argue with my friends in comment sections, and even screenshot private stories to lecture me later. I tried talking to them, but they’d just laugh it off: “We’re your parents! We have a right to know.”
Boundaries Were Crossed
Last year, I started therapy and realized how toxic their behavior was. My therapist helped me draft clear boundaries: no unsolicited advice on posts, no engaging with my friends, and no sharing my content without permission. I delivered this calmly over dinner, thinking they’d understand.
They didn’t. My mom cried about “being shut out,” while my dad accused me of hiding something. For a few weeks, they seemed to comply—until I posted a photo with my new partner. Within minutes, my dad commented: “You could do better.” My mom DMed my partner’s ex (!) to “verify their character.” That was the last straw.
The Block Heard ‘Round the Family
I didn’t block them impulsively. I sent one final message: “I love you, but until you respect my boundaries, I need space online.” Cue the fallout. My aunt called me “ungrateful,” my brother said I was “overreacting,” and my parents… well, they showed up at my apartment.
When I refused to unblock them, my dad said the words that still haunt me: “Family doesn’t block family.” But here’s the thing—family also doesn’t disregard your feelings, manipulate your relationships, or treat your social media like their personal surveillance feed.
Was It an Overreaction?
Part of me wonders if I took it too far. Maybe I should’ve just muted them or set stricter privacy settings. But then I remember the panic attacks before posting anything, the hours spent deleting their comments, and the way my partner flinched when my mom mentioned their ex. This wasn’t just about social media—it was about autonomy.
A close friend (whose parents are similarly intrusive) supported me: “You didn’t cut them off—you just protected your peace.” Still, the guilt creeps in during quiet moments. Were my boundaries too harsh? Should I have given them another chance?
The Aftermath and Reflection
It’s been three months. My parents and I still talk offline, though it’s strained. They claim they “don’t understand” why I did this, but they’ve stopped harassing me about it. Oddly enough, our in-person interactions have improved—maybe because they can’t weaponize my posts against me anymore.
I’ve since learned that boundaries aren’t punishments; they’re self-preservation. Had they respected my initial requests, blocking wouldn’t have been necessary. Still, I grieve the relationship I wish we had—one where trust didn’t require digital barricades.
Was I the Asshole?
Here’s my conclusion: No. Toxic behavior doesn’t get a free pass just because it comes from family. Blocking them wasn’t petty—it was the only way to enforce boundaries they repeatedly violated. Could I have handled it differently? Sure. But after years of dismissal, I chose the option that finally made me feel heard.
To anyone facing similar struggles: Your boundaries are valid. If family won’t respect them, limiting their access to your life isn’t cruel—it’s necessary. And if they truly love you, they’ll eventually learn to adjust.
Your Thoughts?
Have you ever had to block a family member? How did you cope with the guilt? Let’s discuss in the comments—I’d love to hear your stories and advice. And if this resonated with you, share it with someone who needs to hear: You’re not alone.
P.S. If you’re struggling with family boundaries, consider therapy or the book Set Boundaries, Find Peace by Nedra Glover Tawwab. It changed my perspective.
