AITAH for Cutting Off My Sister After She Demanded I Pay for Her Wedding?

When family and finances collide, things can get explosive fast. In this AITAH scenario, we dive into a real story about sibling rivalry, entitlement, and the question of whether generosity has limits.

The Background: Sibling Expectations Gone Wrong

A 32-year-old woman—let’s call her Sarah—shared her story on r/AITAH. Sarah has always been the more financially stable sibling. She worked her way through college, built a successful career, and bought her own home. Her younger sister, Lily, 28, has struggled financially and often relied on family for help.

Sarah never minded pitching in for small things—occasional groceries, help with rent when Lily was unemployed, even contributing to Lily’s credit card bills when she fell behind. But when Lily announced she was engaged, she made a request that crossed the line.

She expected Sarah to pay for her entire wedding.

The Demand: “You Have the Money—It’s No Big Deal”

According to Sarah’s post, Lily’s wedding budget was over $25,000. Lily insisted Sarah should cover it because she was “basically rich.” She framed it as Sarah’s “duty as family” to make her big day possible.

Sarah refused. She explained she’d be happy to give a wedding gift or help in small ways but wasn’t comfortable funding the entire event. She reminded Lily that she had her own goals—paying off her mortgage, saving for retirement, and building her future.

Lily called her selfish. She said Sarah was punishing her for not being “as successful” and accused her of valuing money over family.

After a heated argument, Sarah decided to step back entirely. She blocked Lily’s calls and texts, saying she needed space from the toxicity.

The Fallout: Family Takes Sides

When Sarah told their parents what happened, she was stunned to find they sided with Lily. They argued that Sarah “could easily afford it,” and family should always help family.

Her mother even accused her of “abandoning her sister over something as small as money.”

But to Sarah, it wasn’t about the cash—it was about respect and boundaries. She felt Lily was taking advantage of her generosity and had finally gone too far.

So she turned to Reddit and asked: AITAH for cutting off my sister after she demanded I pay for her wedding?

The Case for Sarah: Boundaries Matter

Plenty of Reddit users were quick to support Sarah. Many agreed that:

• Entitlement isn’t the same as need. Lily didn’t ask for help paying for medical bills or housing—she wanted a luxury wedding.

• Generosity has limits. Being willing to help doesn’t mean you should bankroll someone else’s lifestyle.

• Healthy relationships require mutual respect. Lily’s reaction showed she viewed Sarah’s support as an obligation rather than a kindness.

One top commenter put it bluntly: “Your sister doesn’t see you as family—she sees you as a wallet.”

The Case for Lily: Family Should Support Each Other

Still, a few users sympathized with Lily’s perspective. From her view:

• Sarah has always been the provider in the family.

• Lily felt embarrassed and resentful that she couldn’t afford her dream wedding.

• She may have seen this as the only way to have a special celebration.

But even those who understood Lily’s feelings agreed that demanding money—and then lashing out when refused—crossed a line.

Underlying Issues: Resentment and Comparison

This situation highlights a dynamic many families face: when one sibling is more financially stable, it can create tension, jealousy, and unrealistic expectations.

It’s common for resentment to build up over time, especially if one person constantly feels like they’re “failing” by comparison. But ultimately, comparison and entitlement are not excuses to manipulate or shame someone into paying your bills.

Healthy Boundaries: When Saying No Is Necessary

Sarah’s story shows how important it is to set—and enforce—boundaries. Generosity should come from a place of choice, not obligation. When someone uses guilt to force your hand, it stops being generosity and becomes coercion.

It’s also a reminder that sometimes protecting your mental health means stepping back from people you love—even family.

What Could Sarah Have Done Differently?

Some commenters suggested alternative approaches Sarah might have tried:

• Offering a set contribution amount instead of an open-ended “no.”

• Communicating her boundaries earlier to avoid surprises.

• Facilitating a family discussion about financial expectations before the wedding planning began.

But in the end, many agreed: the way Lily responded was the real problem—not Sarah’s refusal to pay.

The Verdict: Not the Villain

Most of Reddit agreed: Sarah was not the villain here. She was clear about her limits, she tried to be supportive, and she only cut off contact after being insulted and guilt-tripped.