Am I the Jerk for Refusing to Babysit My Sister’s Kids for Free Every Weekend?

Some family favors come with strings attached—and sometimes, those strings feel more like chains. That’s exactly what one Redditor faced when their sister began demanding weekly childcare help…without compensation.

What starts as a one-time favor can quickly spiral into unpaid labor. This story explores the blurred lines between being a supportive sibling and being taken advantage of.

When Helping Family Becomes a Full-Time Job

The Original Poster (OP) shared that they are in their late twenties, working full-time, and enjoying weekends to relax, pursue hobbies, and catch up with friends. A few months ago, OP’s sister asked for a favor: could OP watch her two kids (ages 4 and 6) one Saturday while she ran errands and had a date night?

OP agreed. After all, helping out family occasionally is part of being close.

But then it happened again. And again. And again.

Soon, OP found themselves babysitting every weekend, from Friday night to Sunday afternoon. There was no discussion, no offer of payment, and no real thanks. Just an expectation.

When OP finally said they couldn’t keep doing it every weekend, their sister lost it—accusing OP of being selfish, saying “family helps family,” and even involving their parents, who called OP “lazy” and “childless with no responsibilities.”

Feeling frustrated and manipulated, OP turned to Reddit to ask: Am I the jerk for refusing to babysit for free every weekend, even though it’s for my sister’s kids?

The Unpaid Labor Trap: When “Helping” Isn’t Helping You

Boundaries Are Not Selfish—They’re Necessary

One of the most upvoted comments in the thread put it perfectly: “You’re not a free daycare just because you’re related.”

Setting boundaries doesn’t make someone heartless—it makes them human. OP agreed to help occasionally, not become a full-time caregiver. It’s reasonable to expect that family members respect each other’s time and commitments, especially when the request starts to feel more like a demand.

Emotional Guilt Is a Manipulation Tactic

Many Redditors called out the sister for emotionally manipulating OP with phrases like “family helps family.” While that sentiment can be true in healthy relationships, it often gets weaponized when someone wants free labor or favors without giving anything in return.

The fact that the sister involved their parents to pressure OP further highlighted the manipulative dynamic at play.

The Babysitting Economy: Time Is Valuable

Childcare Is a Job—Even When You’re Related

OP isn’t a teenager with extra time on their hands. They work a full-time job and deserve their weekends to rest, recharge, or simply live their own life. Caring for children is hard work—mentally, physically, and emotionally.

Professional babysitters get paid for their time. Should family members always expect to do it for free?

Even when done with love, ongoing childcare is a form of labor—and it’s completely fair to ask for compensation, or at least gratitude and mutual respect.

The Myth of “You Don’t Have Kids, So You’re Available”

One toxic assumption that emerged in the conversation was that OP’s time is less valuable because they don’t have children. This mindset implies that people without kids are automatically “on call” to support those who do.

That’s not just wrong—it’s harmful.

Everyone’s time has value, whether they’re raising children, building careers, or simply enjoying their personal space. Parenthood is a choice, and that choice shouldn’t come at the expense of another person’s freedom.

What Reddit Said: You’re Not the Jerk

Reddit was overwhelmingly on OP’s side. Here are some standout comments from the thread:

“You gave your sister an inch, and she took the whole weekend.”

“Your sister sounds entitled. No one is owed free childcare, even from family.”

“Babysitting isn’t just ‘watching’—it’s feeding, entertaining, cleaning up after, and keeping tiny humans alive. You deserve a break.”

Many users also pointed out how quickly “favors” turn into expectations. Once someone gets used to having free help, any attempt to reclaim your time is framed as betrayal.

Could There Be a Compromise?

While OP was right to draw a line, some commenters offered possible compromises for future peace:

• Set a specific schedule (e.g., one Saturday a month).

• Request payment or barter an exchange (e.g., “I’ll babysit if you help me with house repairs or errands”).

• Propose professional childcare alternatives if the sister needs regular help.

The key is consent. Helping family should come from choice, not coercion.

Final Thoughts: Respect Is a Two-Way Street

This story is a reminder that even within families, boundaries matter. Being child-free doesn’t mean being automatically available. And offering support doesn’t mean offering yourself up indefinitely.

OP gave time, energy, and patience—and when they finally said “enough,” they were met with guilt and judgment.

The AITAH community was clear: You’re not the jerk.

If anything, the real problem is a culture of entitlement disguised as family obligation.