Should You Ever Forgive a Cheater? Reddit Responds
Infidelity is one of the biggest betrayals in any relationship. For many, discovering that a partner has cheated feels like a gut-wrenching blow that shatters trust and security. But when the initial storm subsides, one lingering question often remains: Should I forgive them? Reddit has become a treasure trove of personal stories, advice, and hot takes on this dilemma, and we’ve gathered some of the most gripping insights to help you navigate this challenging decision.
When Forgiveness is Possible – “It Depends on the Context”
Reddit user shared:
“My partner and I had been together for 10 years when it happened. They were going through a mental health crisis, and I wasn’t emotionally present either. We went to therapy and worked through it. It’s been three years, and we’re stronger than ever. Forgiveness isn’t for everyone, but for us, it worked.”
Many commenters agreed that context matters. If the cheating was a one-time mistake followed by genuine remorse and accountability, forgiveness might be worth considering.
Signs Forgiveness Might Work
- The cheating partner takes full responsibility without blaming you.
- They’re willing to go to therapy or counseling.
- They show consistent effort to rebuild trust over time.
Of course, forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting—it means making peace with what happened and deciding whether the relationship can move forward.

When Forgiveness is a Bad Idea – “They Just Keep Doing It”
On the flip side, some Redditors were adamant that forgiving a cheater is a waste of time. User warned:
“I forgave my ex twice. They promised it wouldn’t happen again, but guess what? It did. Cheating is a pattern for some people. Don’t stick around hoping they’ll change.”
Community members chimed in, emphasizing that serial cheaters often lack the respect and integrity needed for a healthy relationship.
Red Flags You Shouldn’t Ignore
- The partner shifts blame or minimizes the betrayal.
- They’ve cheated multiple times.
- They refuse to make meaningful changes to prevent future issues.
In these cases, walking away might be the healthiest choice.
Community Reactions: Forgive or Forget?
The Reddit debate was fiery, with opinions split down the middle.
“Forgiveness isn’t about them—it’s about you. You don’t have to stay with them to forgive. Let go for your own peace of mind.”
“Once trust is gone, the relationship is basically dead. Don’t waste your time trying to revive it.”
“Couples therapy changed everything for us. It’s not for everyone, but it’s worth a try if both people are 100% committed.”
Final Verdict: What Should You Do?
Deciding whether to forgive a cheater is deeply personal and depends on many factors – including the nature of the betrayal, the level of remorse shown, and your own capacity to heal. Forgiveness can lead to a stronger relationship or simply personal closure, but staying in a toxic situation is never worth it.
Key Takeaways
- Evaluate the situation carefully: Was it a one-time mistake or a pattern?
- Look for accountability: Is the cheating partner truly remorseful?
- Focus on your well-being: Whether you stay or go, prioritize your emotional health.
Remember, you have the power to choose what’s best for you—whether that’s forgiveness or moving on.
What do you think? Would you forgive a cheater, or is that a deal-breaker? Let us know in the comments