AITA for Charging My Family for Thanksgiving Dinner After They Never Help? The Internet Is Divided
For years, I’ve hosted Thanksgiving dinner for my entire family. I love cooking, but it’s expensive and exhausting. This year, I asked everyone to pitch in financially, and chaos erupted. Now, I’m wondering – was I wrong?

The Tradition That Became a Burden
Hosting Thanksgiving started as something I enjoyed. I love seeing family, and I take pride in preparing a big feast. But over time, it became overwhelming.
Every year, I cover all the groceries, spend days cooking, and clean up alone afterward. My family enjoys the meal, packs up leftovers, and heads home without lifting a finger. No one offers to bring a dish or contribute financially.
So this year, I decided things needed to change.
The ‘Pay-to-Eat’ Thanksgiving Controversy
A month before Thanksgiving, I sent a family group chat message explaining that hosting had become expensive and stressful. I asked everyone to either bring a dish or contribute $15 per person to help cover the cost.
Immediately, backlash followed. My mom called, saying I was “ruining the holiday spirit.” My brother accused me of being greedy. A few family members flat-out refused to come if they had to pay.
Some relatives, however, completely understood. My cousin even said she was surprised I hadn’t asked for help sooner.
Internet Reactions: Is OP Justified or Out of Line?
Defending OP:
“If they want a free meal, they should host it themselves.”
“It’s completely fair to ask for help—Thanksgiving isn’t cheap!”
Criticizing OP:
“Charging family to eat at your house? That’s cold.”
“You should have just asked people to bring dishes instead of money.”
Some suggested an alternative: turning the dinner into a potluck, where everyone brings a dish instead of paying.
Setting Boundaries Without Ruining Traditions
At the end of the day, I don’t think it’s wrong to expect help. Maybe I could have handled it differently, but I refuse to keep draining my time and wallet for a thankless meal.
Was I Wrong?
Would you ever charge family for a holiday dinner? Is it selfish, or is it just setting a fair boundary? Let me know what you think!
Takeaways:
This debate highlights the fine line between generosity and being taken advantage of. Whether you think OP is right or wrong, it’s clear that holiday hosting should be a shared effort, not a one-person burden.
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