AITAH for Refusing to Babysit My Sister’s Kids After She Called Me Selfish?

Family dynamics can be tricky, especially when expectations clash with personal boundaries. Recently, I found myself in a heated argument with my sister after I refused to babysit her kids for the third time this month. She called me selfish and accused me of not caring about family. Now, I’m left wondering AITAH for standing my ground?

The Babysitting Backstory

My sister has two young kids, and while I love them dearly, I’ve always made it clear that I’m not a built-in babysitter. Last month, she asked me to watch them for a few hours while she ran errands. I agreed, thinking it was a one-time favor. But then it became a pattern—every weekend, she’d call with some excuse. When I finally said no, she blew up at me, saying I was being unreasonable and that family should always help each other.

Setting Boundaries Early

I’ve always been upfront about my limits. Between my full-time job and personal commitments, I don’t have the bandwidth to be a regular babysitter. I told my sister this from the beginning, but she brushed it off, saying I’d “get used to it.” When I reminded her of our conversation, she accused me of being cold and uncaring. Was I wrong for enforcing boundaries I’d already set?

The Family Guilt Trip

After our argument, my sister took it to the family group chat. Suddenly, I was getting texts from my mom and aunts, all echoing the same sentiment: “Family comes first.” One aunt even said I was being “selfish” for not helping out more. It felt like an ambush. I couldn’t help but wonder—why was I the villain for saying no when my sister never even asked if I was available?

Comparing Responsibilities

Here’s the thing: my sister doesn’t work. Her husband has a high-paying job, and they can afford a nanny. Meanwhile, I’m juggling a demanding career and my own life. When I pointed this out, she snapped that I was “judging her life choices.” But wasn’t she judging mine by expecting me to drop everything for her?

The Breaking Point

The final straw came when she showed up unannounced last Saturday, kids in tow, saying she “needed a break.” I was in the middle of a work deadline and told her I couldn’t help. She called me a “terrible aunt” and stormed off. Now, she’s giving me the silent treatment. Part of me feels guilty, but another part thinks—shouldn’t she respect my time too?

Was I Wrong?

I keep replaying the argument in my head. Maybe I could’ve been more understanding. But then again, why should I feel bad for prioritizing my own life? My sister never considers my schedule or asks in advance she just assumes I’ll say yes. Does that make me the selfish one, or is she the one being unreasonable?

So, I turn to you AITAH for refusing to babysit my sister’s kids after she called me selfish? Have you been in a similar situation? Share your thoughts in the comments—I’d love to hear your perspective.