AITAH for Asking My Partner to Stop Posting Mushy Couple Photos?

I never thought I’d be that person – the one who complains about too much affection. But here I am, questioning whether I crossed a line when I asked my partner to cool it with the constant stream of lovey-dovey Instagram posts. Social media has become our modern relationship battleground, and I need to know: Am I the unreasonable one here?

The Social Media Flood

When Jamie and I first got together six months ago, I found their enthusiastic posting cute. A sunset pic here, a brunch selfie there – normal couple stuff. But over time, it’s escalated to multiple daily posts with captions that make Nicholas Sparks novels look subtle. We’re talking “My heart beats only for you” under a photo of me half-asleep with bedhead, or “When you realize you’ve found your soulmate” tagging me in a pic of our takeout containers.

At first I brushed it off as new relationship energy, but now it’s become overwhelming. My coworkers reference Jamie’s posts in meetings (“Saw you had pancakes in bed – lucky you!”). My mom screenshots them to analyze (“Why does Jamie always post when you’re not smiling?”). Even my dentist mentioned them at my last cleaning.

The Breaking Point

Last week was the final straw. Jamie posted a nine-slide carousel of our private weekend getaway with captions detailing inside jokes and intimate moments. These were memories I considered special because they were just ours, now served up as content for hundreds of acquaintances. That night, I gently asked if we could discuss their posting habits.

“Babe, I love how proud you are of us,” I started carefully, “but would you mind toning down the couple posts a bit? Some things I’d rather keep private.” The look on Jamie’s face – you’d think I’d suggested we break up. They got quiet, then asked if I was ashamed of our relationship.

Different Love Languages

We eventually had a longer talk where Jamie explained that public declarations are their primary love language. For them, shouting our love from the digital rooftops is as natural as breathing. Meanwhile, I’m more private – I show love through quality time and acts of service, not social media performances.

This isn’t about hiding our relationship. I’m happy to be tagged occasionally or share milestones. But the constant stream feels performative, like we’re starring in a reality show instead of building a genuine connection. Jamie countered that I’m being controlling by dictating how they express happiness.

The Privacy Paradox

Here’s what really bothers me: I never consented to having our entire relationship documented online. Jamie doesn’t ask before posting photos of me, sometimes unflattering ones caught mid-bite or mid-sneeze. They share details about our dates, gifts, even minor arguments (always framed as “we’re so strong because…” but still).

In Jamie’s defense, they grew up in a family that shares everything online, while mine was more guarded. But shouldn’t both partners get equal say in what parts of their relationship become public content? I wouldn’t plaster Jamie’s personal moments across billboards in town – why is Instagram different?

Friends Take Sides

When I vented to friends, the reactions split along generational lines. My older friends think I’m justified, with one saying “Relationships need mystery!” Meanwhile, our mutuals in their early 20s act like I’ve committed a cardinal sin. “Jamie’s just proud of you!” they say, or “This is how people show love now – adapt or get left behind.”

Even Jamie’s sister messaged me: “You’re making Jamie feel like their love isn’t good enough.” That stung, because I adore how affectionate Jamie is – just not necessarily on main. Now I’m questioning if my discomfort makes me a cold, unloving partner.

Finding Middle Ground

After some tense days, we’re working toward compromise. Jamie agreed to: 1) Ask before posting my photos, 2) Limit couple posts to 2-3 per week max, and 3) Keep certain moments private. In return, I’m making more effort to occasionally comment on or share their posts.

But the underlying tension remains. Jamie still thinks I’m being unnecessarily private in an oversharing world, while I worry our most authentic moments are being staged for likes. Maybe this is just what modern love looks like – constantly negotiating the line between intimacy and performance.

Your Verdict Matters

So tell me honestly – AITAH for wanting to keep some relationship magic offline? Should I embrace the digital lovefest as harmless fun, or was I right to set boundaries? Have you navigated similar tensions in your relationships?

Drop your thoughts in the comments below – but maybe don’t tag your partner in the response unless you’ve cleared it with them first! And if this post resonated with you, share it (discreetly) with friends who might be dealing with the same social media relationship struggles.