AITAH for Not Giving My Best Friend a Discount on My Photography Services?

When you turn your passion into a business, drawing the line between friendship and professionalism isn’t always easy. Today’s AITAH scenario explores what happens when a simple favor spirals into an argument about loyalty, fairness, and respect.

Let’s dive in.

The Background: From Hobby to Successful Business

The original poster—let’s call her Mia—is a 32-year-old professional photographer. For years, she dreamed of leaving her corporate job to pursue her art full time. Two years ago, she finally took the leap and launched her own photography business. It was a risky move, but her dedication paid off. She now books weddings, portraits, and corporate events nearly every weekend.

Recently, Mia’s best friend, Lauren, announced she was engaged. Naturally, everyone assumed Mia would be the one to capture the big day.

But when Lauren reached out to book Mia’s services, she made it clear she expected a “friends and family” discount—something substantial, since Mia’s full wedding packages cost upwards of $3,500.

The Request: A Massive Discount…or Free?

Lauren sent Mia a message saying:

“I’m so excited to have you shoot the wedding! Obviously, you’d just charge me cost, right? Or maybe you can gift it to us since we’ve been friends forever?”

Mia was taken aback. She explained that photography is her livelihood, and every booking requires time, editing, and expenses. She offered Lauren a modest 10% discount—a courtesy she extends to all friends and family—but said she couldn’t go lower without compromising her income.

Lauren was furious.

She accused Mia of being greedy, ungrateful, and prioritizing money over their friendship. She insisted that real friends help each other, especially during major life milestones.

The Fallout: Friendship on the Rocks

After their heated conversation, Lauren told their mutual friends that Mia was “all about the money now” and didn’t care about the people who supported her along the way.

Mia felt hurt and blindsided. She had always been generous with her time and energy—but she felt this request crossed a line.

She turned to Reddit’s r/AITAH community for clarity, asking: Am I the villain for refusing to give my best friend a huge discount or shoot her wedding for free?

The Community Responds: Boundaries Are Not Betrayal

Why Mia Is Not the Villain

The overwhelming consensus was that Mia was not in the wrong. In fact, many commenters applauded her for standing firm.

• Photography is Labor: Professional photography isn’t just clicking a button. It involves hours of planning, shooting, editing, and delivering final products.

• Friendship Doesn’t Entitle You to Free Work: A true friend respects and supports your career, not just when it benefits them.

• Discounts Should Be a Gift, Not an Obligation: Mia already offered a 10% discount, which was a fair gesture.

One popular comment summed it up perfectly:

“Friends don’t expect you to work for free. They cheer you on as you build something you love.”

Why Lauren Feels Hurt

While Mia’s side is clear, it’s worth acknowledging Lauren’s perspective:

• Personal Expectations: Some people believe that close relationships automatically translate into favors and freebies.

• Emotional Significance: A wedding is an important milestone, and Lauren may have felt Mia’s refusal was a lack of support or excitement.

• Miscommunication: If Lauren assumed Mia would gift her services without ever discussing it, disappointment was inevitable.

But even understanding these feelings doesn’t mean Mia’s boundary was unfair.

The Bigger Lesson: When Business Meets Friendship

Setting Boundaries Early

This situation highlights how critical it is to set expectations from the start. Mia might have been able to avoid conflict by:

• Explaining upfront that her photography is her sole income.

• Sharing her standard pricing and policies in writing.

• Clarifying what she could reasonably offer as a gift or discount.

It’s always better to overcommunicate than to let assumptions fester.

Respect Goes Both Ways

Just as Mia needed to be clear about her business boundaries, Lauren needed to respect that Mia’s time and skills have value. Expecting a friend to take on a major project for free—or nearly free—without asking politely isn’t supportive. It’s entitlement.

The Takeaway: Saying “No” Doesn’t Make You a Bad Friend

Mia’s story resonates because so many people who work for themselves face similar demands. Friends and family often don’t understand how much time, money, and effort goes into professional services.

At the end of the day, friendship should be built on mutual respect, not transactions or guilt trips.